My Inconvenient God

Before you turn into a spitfire for my seemingly irreverent address to the Almighty God, may I just say that those are my doting words for our Heavenly Father? I know, just like you; I thought it inappropriate at first to even think that our God was an inconvenience. However, as we learn more of His glorious nature, attributes, and character as revealed in the Bible, and of our spiritual experiences of Him, we’ll have to admit that He’s not the comfortable God our finite minds have pictured, or should I say, pigeon holed?

Perhaps you can identify with my idle flesh when at times it doesn’t want to yield to the Spirit’s voice of witnessing to somebody. Truth is, not all of my soul winning acts were moved by a natural compassion for souls. When I try to resist the Spirit’s urging, the burden of my indifferent attitude shatters me. It’s just too great and my pride, with all its self-justifications, could not withstand it, so I end up on my knees crying. Having the same sentiment of  Paul in 1 Cor. 9:16, let me say, ‘woe is unto me if I preach not the gospel’. We cannot love people enough to toil for their souls but the love of Christ powerfully constrains us to obey (2 Cor. 5:14).

Now, this is not just in application to the great commission. It’s for all the commands of Christ. Love thy neighbor as thyself (Mark 12:3). Like the first great commandment have we stopped and really pondered what ‘loving others’ mean? Then in John 13:34 Jesus goes on to say,

“A new commandment I give unto you. That ye love one another, as I have loved you, that ye love one another.”

Come to think of it. A new commandment? Why? Well, for me, I know for a fact that I don’t love myself that much. Oftentimes, I abused my body through accepting many workloads, pushing beyond my limit because asking for help makes me feel embarrassed.  Furthermore, I have frequently endangered my ‘being’ by carelessly believing people. Being gullible (and I don’t mean reaching the point of stupidity) is my greatest source of trouble! So if I can’t fully love myself, then how much less others?

You see? Loving our neighbor must not be based on our version of self-love but by Christ’s. Love them as Jesus loved us. The greatest quality of His love is that it gives, demanding nothing in return. Loving like He does is a call to servant hood. You won’t just be called a servant; you will, literally, be treated like one! And you know what its most difficult test is? That is, with the people closest to you, your family. It’s easy to develop a servant attitude for anyone outside your family, but it’s so hard with your siblings! When they’re being a pain in your neck, you can’t help becoming a contemptuous servant.

I’m laughing as I say this, ‘if only I’ve seen this coming, I should have not prayed to God my conformity to the image of Christ.’ Now He’s tremendously giving me lots of opportunities to be Christ-like in the persons of my family (I dote on them okay?) and other visible faces of discomforts. If we’re to be honest with ourselves, we repetitively go through a state of physical unease whenever we practice selfless love. Do I sound like complaining? I’m not, but I wish I could say I’m one of those dynamic Christians, who was just filled with much love for everyone and never once thought of self- preservation. Nevertheless, my flesh constantly protests in God’s sanctifying work in me fearlessly crying, ‘why do You distress me?’ I try hard to silence it for the fear that God would one day thunder in a loud voice saying,

 ‘I am God, Lord of the universe, worshiped in heaven and earth. As your Maker have I not the right to do unto you whatsoever I please?’

Even so, Jesus, in His patience and daily loving kindness, gently shepherds me to continue. The cross was not convenient to Him either .Gradually, He makes me see the reality of His promises in my life. He delights to do me good and not evil (Jer. 29:11). He will not withhold anything necessary to my perfection (Ps. 84:11 Eph. 4:12) for I am His workmanship (Eph. 2:10).

((photo from tumblr)